God is like an atom. Love is like the universe.

No one can see Him, no one can fully control Him. He is a part of everything and everyone. Without Him, all that is around is would not exist. He is indestructable, indivisible, and the fundamental component of the entire universe. He is a part of everything, and everything is a part of him.

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
-Psalms 139:14
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The depth and width of love is like the universe. No one truely knows how vast, alive, or powerful it really is. Occasionally, someone will stumble and fall into a black hole, while others will find themselves a beautiful star and hang onto it forever.

Spawn of Satan better understand what he's up against now

Dearest Marc,

Hello, how was your day today? I hope it was good. As a matter of fact, I hope it was really good. I hope today was one of the best days of the whole year for you. Then tonight, while you reflect on the grand day you've been having, your girlfriend can sit at home all alone, slitting her wrists for the hundredth time and wishing that it would all just be over. Yes, when your messaging Josh or Linden or doing your Geometry homework Alex can be staring at the phone, head cocked to the side, mascara and tears running down her cheek, wondering if she's not good enough for little Marc-y boy to ever call her.
Doesn't that sound great?

This letter is fair warning to you that a relationship takes two to make and one to break.
Right now things are looking pretty shitty on your side.

Sure, you can make up all the fucking excuses you want to about your failing Geometry grades and all your dirty laundry, but even so does that mean your too busy to ever call Alex, even just to ask, "Hey, how was your day today?"

I hope you realize your ignorance is hurting more then one person, here.
Your lack of caring is creating a domino effect, whether or not you like it.
One of these days, if you don't act up to your part, Alex will finally snap and end it with you.
Oh, but she would end more then just her "romantic" relationship with you, Marc.
She wouldn't speak to your whiny-ass face ever again.

Don't be fooled by the fake smiles and the I-understand-you-need-time-for-Geometry-so-don't-bother-calling-me-ever things that she says.
Marc, Alex has more faith in you then you realize. She cares about you.

Now the ball's in your court, buddy.

I hope you don't fuck this up even more.

Warm regards,
-An observant bystander


P.S. Congratulations on receiving your first official Relationship Warning letter! I wish you luck in recovering from this situation and pray that it never happens again.

P.S.S. This letter was written completely by xxxxxx. It was a work of my independent hand and valuable time.

Happy fucking Valentine's Day

All alone. By my own hand.


Oh well. I plan on going upstairs soon and watching Brokeback Mountain, anyways.


Marc turns out to be an even bigger dickweed then first thought to be. He ditched his plans with Alex today because he would rather be alone and listen to his music. Oh my God-if I were Alex I would totally dump him.

Then again, I wouldn't have dated him in the first place.

And Zack...is a TALL guy who's coming to my house this Saturday to hang out. I'll be meeting him for the first time...and I know those things about him because of his profile pictures.

Can't wait!

Honesty, is it the best policy?

Today I decided to have what I like to call an "honesty day". What that means is that all day anyone could ask me anything that they wanted to and I was going to answer it completely and honestly. And, I told a lot of people everything that I felt towards them.

Remember Josh? Well, I told him that I kind of like him. That was a milestone for me!
How so? Whenever the topic of guys comes up, I always run and hide or lie, but today was different. Today I told him that I was fairly certain that I liked him, and he thought that was cool. Then about five minutes later, he said that although I was "very pretty and funny", he "likes Linden currently".
That's alright. I think I can deal with that. It's only been a two or three week long potential crush, and, quite frankly, even if he did like me back the bigger accomplishment was me actually telling a guy the truth about my feelings.

Remember Marc? Of course you do, dumb question. Well, I told him today that.....nope, I didn't tell him about my feelings towards him, I played messenger and told him what Alex felt towards him. (I didn't tell everyone I knew what I felt about them. That would take forever.)

And of course, he returned the emotions.

Oh, how sweet.

Anyway, I highly recommend that you have an Honesty Day once and a while.
By that I mean once every five years or so.

If tomorrow is indeed a Snow Day, then I shall catch up on my sleep and reestablish my state of mind. After a day of complete honesly, I would greatly appreciate a day to recover from it and hide my face for twenty four hours.

You would, too, if you had an Honesty Day.

If tomorrow is school though, I will be very sad.
Not to mention tired.

The chances of a snow day are higher though, so I'm hoping that it happens.

Oh, and tomorrow I will be sure to tell you all about Zack. :]

Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

Yeah, obvioulsy Marc is still on my nerves.
Yesterday he said that almost everything that goes wrong or gets screwed up is my fault. I partially think he was joking, yet at the same time I think it was another personal jab at me.

Would somebody please tell me what the fuck I ever did to this guy? Why is he being such a dickweed about everything I do?

Someone thinks that's his way of showing that he likes me.

Ha ha. He's dating my best friend. What, he's using her or something?

Kiss my ass, he is.

Then today he said that my AIM screenname was "one that a gay guy would have".

Those don't sound like really big deals, do they?
Well, if you knew all of the other shit he's been throwing onto me, you'd see why these little things aren't so little.


On a much lighter and happier note, Barack Obama won a Grammy today for Best Spoken Word Album category for his recording 'The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts On Reclaiming The American Dream' at the 50th Annual Grammy Awards in Los Angeles.

Congratulations, Obama!

And then there was one...

...but it's my own fault anyway. I went and fucked up a good thing.

A boy does like me--no, wait..did like me....and I pretty much screwed up whatever was there of him liking me in a boyfriend/girlfriend kind of way.

He was one of the cutest, nicest...TALLEST boys that I knew! His name was Jonathan and--now he's history.

And it's all my fault.

I could have had a best friend. Or boyfriend. Or more.

Then I opened up my fucking mouth and BLEW IT.

He flat out asked me if I liked him, but instead of replying with a simple and honest "Yes", I got nervous and lied and told him that, "I'm just your friend...I don't like you like that"

So now he no longer flirts with me and just gives me sad looking eyes. Everytime I look into those sad yet somewhat sexy blue eyes of his I feel terrible about lying, but I can't tell him the truth because then I'll look like a cowardly prick!

It's a lose-lose situation.

Today is exactly eight days before Valentine's Day. All of my friends have a nice boyfriend they'll be spending the day with. Said boyfriends will be buying them chocolates, roses, movie tickets, clothes...cuddling them, and just loving on them all day.

Since there is no hope for me anymore, I plan on spending my Valentine's Day cooped up in my room, all alone, eating Frango Mints or Ferro Roches and watching Brokeback Mountain.

Alex, girlfriend of that bastard Marc, invited me to come spend Heart's Day with her and Marc. While they watch movies, cuddle, kiss, eat dinner.....oh dear God NO.
I don't plan on going there. Not on my life. Not with the spawn of Satan present.

Unless God has a hidden guy waiting to give me roses in these next eight days, my Valentine's Day will be quite lonely. Lately God has been pretty much ignoring me, though.

Damn it, God.

Marc the jackass- -Take 2- -

Alright, so for a few days I actually thought that he was beginning to tone down on the asshole-ness.

But, after today, I guess not.

He still doesn't like to talk to me for more than five minutes at a time, whereas his best (need I mention c-u-t-e-!) friend won't STOP talking to me. Here I'm trying to just ask dear Marc how his day was, and he just shrugs me off and says something udderly rude to me, and Josh (his c-u-t-e-! best friend) won't stop asking me how my day was and so on and so forth.

I'm totally fine if Josh ends up having a thing for me. Heart's day is only ten days away...who knows what can happen between here and there!

Oh, Alex and Marc have plans for the fourteenth. He's going over to her house (they're going to be there alone) and they're going to eat some snacks and watch some movie and snuggle while sipping hot cocoa near her fireplace. Aww.....SOMEONE GET ME A FUCKING BARF BUCKET!

I just don't get it. How can such a sweet, nice, TALL guy like Josh be best friends with a jerk like Marc? Marc's his complete opposite! He's NOT sweet, NOT nice, and NOT tall!
If Marc wasn't cute, he would have nothing going for him.
Lucky bastard.